EduClaytion

During the holiday break, I’ve discovered another way that Google makes life better.  Well, more interesting anyway. 

Have you ever began typing a search question only to have random phrases suggested to help you complete your query?  These phrases are based on real searches done by real people, and they are fascinating.  I’m amazed at how many people go directly to the Google box with life’s largest dilemmas, but apparently they do.  You really should try it out. 

You can start simple enough.  For example, type in a basic open ender like “how do I” and see what pops up.  My personal favorite is “how do I know if I’m pregnant.”  Sorry honey, anyone who could potentially create life should at least be equipped enough to figure out that little mystery without Google.  Maybe she should chat with all the people asking “how do I get pregnant.” 

Here’s some other tasty little chestnuts from the search monster.  They are as interesting as they are indicative of how insane our society has become.  All you have to do is begin to suggest something like… 

Why would anyone… 

Hits under this opener range from “why would anyone believe in God” to “why would anyone name a cleanser Ajax.”  What the?  You can also explore why anyone would get married, buy a Mac, or play Russian roulette.  My favorite has to be ”why would anyone want to be led by you.”  

What should I… 

This one’s good for figuring out that Halloween costume or the right Christmas gift for your boyfriend, but my personal favorite is the blunt “what should I do with my life.”  Your in luck though.  Looks like there’s even a quiz to find the answer. 

What will… 

I gotta say this one surprised me.  Almost every question here is about looks or 2012.  What will happen in 2012?  Moreover, everyone wants to know what their baby will look like or what they will look like when they get old.  In case your curious, here’s a website that attempts to morph your image into your future self.  I give fair warning: This site may FREAK YOU OUT!  They say it’s for fun only, but your jaw may drop when you see images of your future self.  Fun to see your kids as teenagers too.  Still freaky. 

 Can I go… 

Maybe you’re wondering if you can go blonde like so many Googlers.  Perhaps you too want to know if you can go to Canada with a DUI or to jail for credit card debt.  Nothing else here tops the timeless desire of women everywhere to know if they can go bowling while pregnant. 

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There’s always the less imaginative ”how do I know if she…”  I can’t believe how many of these questions are about pregnancy.  I thought you women would have all this stuff figured out after countless hours of the chatting I already overhear.  

For the more daring of you out there, go ahead and simply ask Google “why?”  This will be especially helpful for those of you out there with green poop. 

You’ll have to chase down some of your own.  I’d love to hear about the wildest rabbit holes you open up.  The next adventure will be clicking on results to some of these crazy questions.  Who knows?  Maybe you can find the secret of life on Yahoo Answers.  At the very least, you should be able to figure out why men have nipples.